Thursday, December 24, 2009


i remember christmas, two years ago
i remember waking up in the morning
i remember wondering, what's the point?
i remember opening presents
i remember faking smiles
i remember creeping into my room right after all of my gifts were unwrapped
i remember opening the jaws of a pair of scissors
i remember placing the blade against my wrist
and dragging it across
i remember the neat red line
i remember the scar
i remember thinking to myself,
merry christmas.

Wednesday, December 16, 2009


i can feel myself relapsing
into my former self
against my will.

"life itself is holding me by my wrists
and i am drowning.
it squeezes my head,
covers my mouth,
its many tentacles doing its will

and i am dying."

i told her this.

she had nothing to say.